Healing Infertility & Loss PTSD: Cultivating Well-Being

Author of Believing in Conceiving: The Four Spiritual Keys to Getting and Staying Pregnant, Jenilyn Gilbert, shares her experience with the process of healing from the trauma associated with infertility and loss of pregnancy, and its relationship to PTSD.

I am going to share about the talk given by Richard Miller, the creator of irest, a form of yoga nidra or yogic sleep. This was truly a fascinating conference especially learning how other professionals blend body-mind techniques into helping others.

Infertility Trauma & PTSD

A couple of weekends ago I attended a yoga therapy conference which blended my two professions of social work and yoga beautifully.

I’m not sure how many women think about infertility, and the losses associated with it as trauma, but sometimes even naming it as such can bring a level of healing. As a yogi and psychotherapist, Richard Miller has worked specifically with vets returning from war, homeless people, and victims of sex trafficking. As I was listening to him describe PTSD (post-traumatic stress disorder) I was thinking about my fertility-challenged clients and how similar their experiences were to these aforementioned populations. I believe that many women who experience reproductive trauma also have PTSD.

Symptoms of PTSD for a Woman Experiencing Infertility

PTSD is a mental health condition, which is triggered by witnessing or experiencing a terrifying event. Symptoms may include flashbacks, nightmares, or severe anxiety. For a lot of people who have experienced trauma, they may experience temporary difficulty with coping in the world, but over time and with self-care techniques they usually get better. However, if the symptoms worsen or last for months or years, or disrupt your daily routines, you may have PTSD.

For a woman who may have experienced a miscarriage it may look like this…she avoids the hospital where she received her ultrasound, which delivered heartbreaking news. She may feel hopeless about how many years she has been trying to build her family, have trouble sleeping, concentrating, or may feel numb. She may be surprised that her initial feelings of sadness turn into anger, irritability or feelings of shame for her body not working like she’d like it to. Or she may not like the person she has become.

Cultivating Well-being

Whether or not you experience PTSD symptoms, the following questions, created by Miller, can bring a sense of well-being in a rather short time frame. Take a few minutes to answer the following questions. (it’s supposed to be 6 questions. I somehow got 7…it still works).

1. Where do you feel well-being in your body?
2. Where is the outermost border of this sensation and where is the inner most center?
3. What is your sense of past or future?
4. In this experience of well-being do you lack or need for anything?
5. Is this feeling of well-being familiar or unfamiliar?
6. Did it take special circumstances to feel into well-being?
7. What words would I use to describe this feeling of well-being today?

These seven questions prepare you for a deeper exploration of your inner feelings. It is recommended that you ask these questions several times a day to get the full experience. Rather than meditating for 20 minutes a day, re-engaging with your natural state of being throughout the day is a more useful practice.

By Jenilyn Gilbert, Author & LCSW